I was inspired to read some of Caroline Stephen’s book, Quaker Strongholds, after taking a class on Virginia Woolf last semester (Stephen is Woolf’s aunt). I wanted to share a section on silence that I bookmarked and have been thinking about for the last few days.
Take a deep breath.
Let it out.
Take another one.
Release.
Now, read with me.
It seems to me that nothing but silence can heal the wounds made by disputations in the region of the unseen. No external help, at any rate, has ever in my own experience proved so penetratingly efficacious as the habit of joining in a public worship based upon silence. Its primary attraction for me was in the fact that it pledged to me nothing, and left me altogether undisturbed to seek for help in my own way. But before long I began to be aware that the united and prolonged silences had a far more direct and powerful effect than this. They soon began to exercise a strangely subduing and softening effect upon my mind. There used, after a while, to come upon me a deep sense of awe, as we sat together and waited — for what? In my heart of hearts I knew in whose name we were met together, and who was truly in the midst of us. Never before had his influence revealed itself to me with so much power as in those quiet assemblies…
Take a deep breath.
Release.
Consider the sounds around you. I hear my computer whirring, my keyboard keys being tapped as I write this, birds chirping outside, my chair squeaking, and the washing machine outside my door spinning. My phone just vibrated with a message from my sister.
I’ve been thinking about silence, meditation, and mindfulness lately with respect to programming. I saw this piece on mindful code exercises on Twitter recently, and I love it so much. But, Stephen’s words on “united and prolonged silences” struck me. While bookending coding sessions with meditations or repeating mantras while writing code reviews (I love that one) are great, I get stuck thinking that it’s okay if I keep sticking mindfulness activities into my daily work, instead of setting aside some time to be silent with other people. I have found that centering myself with guided meditation YouTube videos in my room have been really good for my anxiety, but, for me at least, I also need that deeper centering that comes from silent worship in a group setting. I also, frankly, do not have the self-discipline yet to do silent meditation for any more than ten minutes by myself; that’s where it helps to be in an hour-long unprogrammed meeting. 🙂
Quakers in Tech 